Controversial predictions and rankings of all 32 NFL starting QBs just in time for regular-season kickoff

Finally, settling on a starting quarterback days before the regular-season begins is not a good thing. It's not tactical craftiness to deny the opposition time to prepare, nor is it typically a choice between two good options.

It is a poorly veiled cry for help.

Meet the Atlanta Falcons.

FALCONS NAME SIXTH DIFFERENT WEEK 1 STARTING QUARTERBACK IN SIX YEARS

On Monday, the first day of their week's preparation for a Sunday season-opener at the Pittsburgh Steelers, they announced Tua Tagovailoa as their starter. But beyond that opener?

"I don't think it's fair to really go past this week on anything related to our football team," head coach Kevin Stefanski said.

Left unsaid is Michael Penix Jr. is advancing to a place where he can play in the regular season. So his starter status is looming.

Also unsaid: The Falcons are in some trouble.

The fact is, great teams typically get great quarterback play. It doesn't mean they have great quarterbacks. It means the ones they have play great.

Jalen Hurts is not a great quarterback. But he played great in helping the Philadelphia Eagles win the Super Bowl. Josh Allen is a great quarterback. But he hasn't played well enough, especially not in the playoffs, to get the Bills to a Super Bowl.

Based on that, we celebrate the Wednesday night kickoff of the 2026 NFL season with a ranking of what the league's 32 starting quarterbacks are likely to do in the next five months.

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This is a predictive ranking of which QBs are about to ball and dominate. And which are about to curl up in a ball and disappoint:

32. Jacoby Brissett: He's a fine backup quarterback, but as a starter, he's a fine backup quarterback. 

31. Deshaun Watson: Unless he has a time machine that teleports him back to 2020, this isn't going to go well.

30. Tua Tagovailoa: Might not make it to Week 2 as the starter.

29. Cam Ward: He's growing as a QB, but he's far from full-grown.

28. Malik Willis: The 2026 Dolphins have rejected the idea of surrounding the QB with a good supporting cast and Willis will pay a price for it.

27. Geno Smith: It'll be better than the first NYJ stint (doesn't say much), but not good enough to lift his team above third place in the AFC East.

26. Kirk Cousins: This will work great if Brock Bowers catches 300 passes and Ashton Jeanty and Mike Washington Jr. combine for 2,500 rushing yards.

25. Tyler Shough: He's about to turn 27, so the kid gloves developmental period ends or else his replacement comes next season.

24. Jaxson Dart: Over-under on season trips to the blue tent is 4.

23. Bryce Young: Promises more improvement, which means a one-time draft bust might be really good in 2026.

22. Daniel Jones: Good in spurts but never consistently great.

21. Jalen Hurts: Great in spurts, but an excellent team nee