Jeff Arcuri reveals how 'Bachelorette' wifes cancer fight transformed his comedy — and their marriage

Life can be uncomfortable. Jeff Arcuri has built a career on finding the joke in uncomfortable moments.

"I think you can make anything funny. You can make awkwardness funny if youre just honest. People respond to the honesty," the comic told Fox News Digital.

That philosophy has been shaped by nearly two decades of stand-up, but the last few years have tested it in ways Arcuri could not have scripted. As his career surged toward his first special, "Jeff Arcuri: Nice to Meet You," now streaming on Netflix, his personal life grew more complicated when his wife, "Bachelorette" alumna Katie Thurston, was diagnosed with .

"The past two years with my wife kind of grew me up a little bit," Arcuri said. "So my comedy kind of matured, and thats what the special is. The first half is the stuff that I found funny, and the second half is a lot of s--- that really happened to me."

Rather than rely on material he had accumulated over years, Arcuri said he wanted the special to reflect the reality he was actually living.

"Theres no way Im going to do a special not talking about whats going on in my current life right now."

Long before Arcuri applied that philosophy to deeply personal material, it was central to the crowd work that helped him gain a following online.

He said he often prefers engaging with someone who appears reluctant to participate rather than the person eager to become part of the show.

"I want him, because now if he laughs, I win," Arcuri said. "Hes going to answer honestly, thinking its going to throw me off. But in reality, hes probably going to only build it, because a truthful audience member is the most valuable, hilarious thing."

That belief in honesty created a challenge in "Nice to Meet You": telling jokes that were true to his experience without bumming out the crowd. He needed to make it safe for viewers to laugh when the subject matter became serious.

Arcuri recalled saying during the special that one of the hardest parts of his wifes illness was getting her to laugh, "because thats all I got."

The line was not necessarily intended as a joke, he said, and audiences at most of the tapings did not treat it like one. But one crowd laughed.

"I guess Im that good," he jested, noting that small adjustments in delivery can make huge changes in the show. It didn't mean pretending the underlying experience was not serious.

That approach extended beyond the stage. Asked whether he was comfortable discussing his wifes diagnosis, Arcuri responded plainly, "Yeah. I put it on Netflix."

He said he and Thurston have found value in talking openly about what they are experiencing rather than treating cancer as a forbidden subject. Thurston shares cancer updates on her Instagram account, which Arcuri said is followed by a lot of women going through their own experiences with illness. She tends to be very transparent about her diagnosis and treatment — perhaps too transparent.

Arcuri said he sometimes learns updates about his wife through her Instagram broadcast page. "Call me first!" he joked.

Poking fun at the situation is key to the couple's coping strategy. He recounted one of his wife's quips that made his father spit his food out.

"My wife gave me Lactaid at the dinner table because I forgot it in my hotel room ... I go 'Oh, thank you, my angel.' And she said, 'Don't call me that, I ain't dead yet!'"

Arcuri resisted describing that material as "dark comedy," since he didn't write it with that in mind. Rather, he simply wanted his act to be true to his life.

"If anything, I had to make light of something hard," he said.

Arcuris current ease onstage came after years in which success was far less certain.

The comic got his start in comedy around 2009 or 2010, he said, after which he spent some time tel